Saturday, July 30, 2011

Chapter no. 10: The Incident (V)


He was standing at the terrace of his room, and that moment if he would have got wings on his arms like birds and he could be able to take a flight then it wouldn’t be so amazing for him how amazing it was for him, Qandeel talking to him continuously one and half hour on phone.

He was happy and so happy that wasn’t able to grasp that happiness, few stars present on dark sky at the midnight were never felt so charming before this, silent breezes blowing at this hour of night were never felt so soft, so smooth and so pleasing before this, everything of the universe was never felt dancing like this even in the grave silence, and he had never felt so much love for the Owner of this Universe before this.

And it was true; he had never felt love for God like this before. And for the first time he wished to talk to God, and to say everything to Him which he never said before, to tell to God that as despite of being Almighty He loves Ilaaf so much, in the same way, despite of being a sinner Ilaaf loves Him too, to pay thanks for each and every blessing that was showered on him by God and which he could never do before, to prostrate to God which he could never do before, for softening Qandeel’s heart for him, and for blessing him like this, and for which, to make a promise to Him to be faithful now onwards.

Ilaaf had felt God so close to him that moment, He was Almighty who accepted his each and every pray that rose inside his heart even before he could raise his hands to pray, He was merciful whose mercy was showered on Ilaaf, when even Ilaaf didn’t use to call His name with his tongue, He was Allah by calling Whose name everything in the universe used to come close and hear, and how kind was Allah on Ilaaf.

The softness in the tone of Qandeel, hearing everything carefully said by Ilaaf, commenting, answering, just two days ago it was a mere thought and idea for Ilaaf and just after two days it was a mere reality which had happened, and every breath of Ilaaf was like indebted by the happiness of that one moment.

He came inside, and then sat down on the carpet near the bed, bending both arms he kept them over the bed and head over the arms, and then he started laughing, because laughter of Qandeel was echoing in his ears.

How unlike she was, and how she was commenting without any hesitation on everything said by Ilaaf. Any other girl could never show her opinion so explicitly, perhaps not even a bold girl like Aleeshah because even she like many other girls had considered love a ruse, which looks good to eyes for a while then when the eye is opened the reality seems different, but Qandeel Yousuf was unusual. She had considered love as an obligatory part of the life, not the temporary happiness of few days or perhaps she had considered love just as life, and talking about one’s own life the hesitation vanishes like this.

While laughing he remembered the eyes of Qandeel and the shining that they had, which was hope of life for Ilaaf. His eyes were getting shut, slumber was overwhelming, it was a peaceful sleep, and Ilaaf even didn’t feel the need to change the place and get onto bed, he slept then and there.

It was a beautiful waterfall which was falling from a high mountain, and over that mountain, at some distance to the waterfall, he was standing with Qandeel. Qandeel was wearing white clothes and that white color was looking good with her, her hairs were untied and were trying to fly here and there with the blow of air, and Qandeel was trying to push back her hairs from her face, but was entangled badly, because at one hand that swift breeze was dispersing her hairs, at the other hand her stole was going out of the grip of her hand. Ilaaf went to Qandeel walking, she was fighting with that blow of air and was tired trying to control her hairs and stole. The blow was so intense that even Ilaaf’s feet trembled but he controlled himself easily. He came near to Qandeel, she looked him. Her eyes had powerlessness; she needed the help of Ilaaf. He smiled then moving ahead held her stole firmly, turned back the soft stole of Qandeel on the opposite current of air then smoothly put it over her shoulder. Qandeel looked him with thankful sight; Ilaaf coiled the stole around her arms smiling and gave into her hands so that it couldn’t be flown away again. Then he pushed back her naughty hairs from her face using his hand. Qandeel’s face went red, she smiled and just then a windstorm suddenly started to blow over the the mountain, a tornado had just arrived. The feet of Qandeel trembled, Ilaaf held her moving ahead. She had a fear on her face, she held Ilaaf’s collar firmly, and then she kept her head over his chest being scared. Ilaaf took her into his arms. The air was blowing fiercely, for a moment Ilaaf felt like that storm would take everything with its blow, but then he fixed his feet onto ground. He had decided, no matter how fierce that storm would be, he would not let his feet to loose hold. He knew that if he lost his hold only for a moment then everything would end, he hadn’t cared about himself, he was concerned about Qandeel, couldn’t give her into hands of that unkind storm. Qandeel rasied her head and looked him, her eyes had some request along with fear, Ilaaf looked her smiling then bowing ahead kissed her forehead, this time Qandeel had some satisfaction on her face. Once again Qandeel kept her head on his chest; Ilaaf firmed the hold of his arms around her. How fierce that storm was, it couldn’t be more powerful than the love of Ilaaf.

When he opened his eyes then the calls of Fajar prayers were rising. Rubbing his eyes he raised his head from the bed and just then he felt that he had slept as it is sitting on the carpet last night. He had never slept so deeply, and that dream…..mind was still slumbering but the heart was waking. How strange and beautiful dream that was, and Qandeel……how close she was to Ilaaf in the dream. He stood smiling and came on the terrace; the calls of Fajar prayer seemed beautiful and charming for ears in that silence. Incising the grave silence, the echoes of Allah-o-Akbar, were doing same for this pindrop silence, what the first ray of Sun used to do with darkness.

Didn’t know what happened, his heart had some strange feeling that moment. God, who blessed him with each and every blessing of this world, and now, the greatest blessing in the form of love of Qandeel was about to shower over him, was Ilaaf so narrow-minded that even then not for a single time could bow down in front of Him and pay thanks.

He never used to offer prayer, he never felt the need. He could never understand that why people offer prayer, so he could never think about it. Since childhood, he used to see Maa and Daadi offering their prayers, but beside this when he had seen Baba and Daada Saaiyen never go to mosque except Friday and Eid then his little brain used to think that perhaps prayers are just offered by those who are not busy and have lots of free time. This misunderstanding of him was swept away later on when one day Maa and Daadi explained to him that why they offer prayer, he understood it somehow but personally could never feel interest in this activity. Maa and Daadi left this decision totally onto him; in case of prayers both of them had their own logic. They had thought this is to be decided by Ilaaf himself that does he need to prostrate in front of God or not, because Allah doesn’t need a prayer which is offered with an intention of giving a favor to God, instead God has liked such a prayer which is offered in thankfulness and love for Him.

And he felt that this logic was not wrong by the way. For the first time in life, now, when he was thankful to God and feeling His love moving inside out in his soul then his heart was itself passionate to bow down in front of God. Perhaps God always wait for the same prostration, which is offered with love, not due to fear or oblige.

He came inside; he remembered the process of Wuzu. He performed Wuzu and then changed the dress, and then called Fazal. After a while Fazal came inside and looking him waking so early in the morning before Sunrise, was surprised.

“I need the prayer-carpet.” He told Fazal.

Fazal shrugging with surprise looked him.

“I have said something, Fazal.” He said again.

“Jee Saaiyen, just bringing.” He went out. Ilaaf smiled.

After a while he was offering prayer.

Didn’t know after how many years he was offering prayer like this, otherwise at the event of Eid, in the central mosque of the village, behind Imam it was bit easy to offer prayer especially for non-praying ones just like him. Now offering prayer alone, the secret was revealed on Ilaaf that the method to offer prayer which he had learned by Maa and Daadi in childhood still wasn’t forgotten. Every fundamental of prayer, each suraah which was to be recited during prayer, every ayat, he had still remembered everything and that was surprising for Ilaaf. Perhaps the prayer is a method to express love and worship and which is directly associated to our soul, learning once in childhood whether one doesn’t offer for years, but whenever standing on the prayer-carpet tries to remind then like a routine it is always reminded.

After finishing the prayer, he rasied his hands for praying, had thought that perhaps wouldn’t get the words, but sometimes each and everything of this universe seem kind to us, and that moment everything even the words were kind to Ilaaf. Speaking to God like this was felt very easy that moment by him.

“I was unaware, didn’t know that how charming this world is and how beautiful the life, that’s why despite of knowing everything I could never feel that what is the importance of Creator for the creation. When I loved her, desired for her just then knew that some relationships are unbreakable, and my relationship with You is just the same. I didn’t call Your name for years, didn’t talk to You, didn’t remember You, didn’t ask for anything to You, didn’t pray to You, didn’t ask forgiveness for all my mistakes and carelessness, didn’t show my love for You, but now when I see then feel that despite of this carelessness and unconcernness, my relationship with You never got weaker. You are as close to me as You were always, and this peace which is getting into my soul this moment, is the biggest evidence of this truth.” He was feeling good, to say to God what was lying in his heart, so kept saying. “The earth of my heart was infertile; You irrigated it with the love of Qandeel. My life was motionless like stagnant water; You made a commotion in it by throwing the stone of desire in it. Every color of my life was fainted like a colorless cloth; You made it colorful with the laughter of Qandeel. Every view of my eye was illusioned; You took it to the belief by giving the light of the eyes of Qandeel Yousuf. I didn’t know what is quest; You explained its meanings with the smile of Qandeel.” There was a belief which was overwhelming slowly and gradually. “Oh, my Lord, by spreading my both hands I just ask to You, one thing for me in this world and that is the love of Qandeel and her being with me. I don’t know the manners of love so could know how to love You, teach me those manners with love of Qandeel. With the light of her love, remove the darkness from my life, and spread the illumination all around me so that I can see each and everything very clear, and I could be able to see this world in that light with my own eyes and I never would need anyone else’s spectacles to see and analyze the life. Allah, now I just need Qandeel’s love and her being for me, don’t send me back disappointed.” After the pray while moving his hands over his face, he had believed that now Qandeel wouldn’t refuse in any way, he had a belief on his love and now he was fully confident that Qandeel wouldn’t twitch away his hand.

Man is stupid, remains towards benefit until shows his love, as soon as he makes a confession of love, he creates the difficulty for himself, but the truth is that human being doesn’t want to remain towards benefit because he is a human and he is agreed to have a trade of loss in order to know the secret of the life. For the first time in life, Ilaaf had made his confession of love for God, but he didn’t know that in love the test begins just after the confession.

In the late afternoon, he planned to have shopping after a long time. Before leaving home, he talked to Qandeel on phone, and talking to her even just few minutes was pleasing for Ilaaf.

After taking few things for his personal use, he came to the jewelers. Whenever he used to gift some jewellery items to Maa or Daadi, used to buy it from the same shop, and that’s why the shop owner knew him very well. Ilaaf asked him to show few jewellery items, the shop owner showed the gold items to him, but then Ilaaf explained to him that he just is interested to buy platinum and not gold, “She doesn’t like gold, just show me the platinum jewellery items that you have.” And just then the jeweller had the idea that this time the shopping is for a third woman and not for Maa or Daadi. He showed all jewellery items in platinum that he had but Ilaaf didn’t like anyone, finally he offered to Ilaaf that he should get something on order and Ilaaf had liked this advice because as a first gift of love, he wanted to present something very different to Qandeel.

He selected a design of a platinum ring from the catalogue which had few diamonds endorsed with it, and told the jeweler that he wants to order little wide, broad and thick ring not the usual ring normally they make. Jeweler asked that either Ilaaf wants some other changes in the design on which Ilaaf asked that either it is possible to engrave the name over the ring. When jeweler nodded his head then Ilaaf wrote the name of Qandeel on a paper and gave it to him, and asking him to dispatch the order soon he made the advance payment. And for the first time it had happened that he had made the payment in cash instead of credit card and the only reason was that the money was his own, not from the amount that was transferred by Baba or Daada Saaiyen into his account every month. Last year, in London, he had kept few of his paintings in an exhibition and which were sold out in a good amount. He was paid in pounds which he converted in the local currency when returned to Pakistan, and from that day those ruppees were kept in the drawer of his cupboard. Ilaaf never needed to use them. And now, as he didn’t want to buy anything for Qandeel with the money he owned by Baba Saaiyen, so therefore today before leaving home he had taken out that money and carried with him.

Jeweler made the receipt and giving to Ilaaf had said.

“Sir, are you getting married?” Some other time if anyone would have asked this so personal question to him then perhaps Ilaaf would have reacted badly but the love of Qandeel had changed him inside out, so unwillingly he smiled and shaking his head said.

“Yes, soon.”

Jeweler told that ring will be sent to his home within one week. He had placed orders for certain jewellery items for Maa before this and everytime they used to send those at home.

He came outside the shop and just then got a call from Baba Saaiyen on mobile.

He received the call.

“What you have said to the manger that you want to work for the company as an employee. What happens to you sometimes, Ilaaf? Why do you act in such ways that make me and Baba Saaiyen to face insult?” Baba Saaiyen was pretty angry.

Ilaaf knew that what he had to do in such situations.

“Oho, Baba Saaiyen, what Daniyal Sahib has told you, he oftenly understands just half of my words. I just told him that now I will look after the company regularly, and therefore I want to present my services to the company as a professional architect, so that my abilities couldn’t be rusted and the company would get advantage as well. Just try to understand, Baba, sitting idle like this I am wasting the hard work of my last few years, therefore want to do some professional projects along with the other activities. There is nothing like disgust or insult in this, Baba Saaiyen, and no other activity will be affected with this step of mine, rather I won’t let it to affect.” Then Ilaaf told him about the proceeding related to the interview. Qaiser Laashari was bit surprised and perhaps pleased as well for Ilaaf taking interest in the interview. Even then he didn’t want Ilaaf to work as an architect for the company.

For a while both of them kept arguing, and then finally Ilaaf agreed him.

He quit the phone laughing, was very easy now. Slowly and gradually everything was happening as he had thought and he wanted next steps to be settled like this.

Immediately he called Daniyal Sahib and informed him that he will join the company from Monday, and now being the owner of the company, he will work as a professional architect as well.

Then he left for the home and reaching home a surprise was ready for him.

Adnan, Rohail and Shaiq were waiting for him. With surprise he felt happiness as well because he was already very happy.

“Since you came back from the village; just had reserved yourself inside home like girls. We are dying to even look your face.” Adnan was in mood of some fun. Ilaaf was surprised on Rohail who came there with Adnan, and that’s why he asked the reason to him.

“Since the university ended, I am extremely feeling bored; liked the advice of Adnan so came. It’s long since we went out together for outing.” Ilaaf smiled. “Leave me; tell about you, why are you looking so happy?” Rohail asked.

“Just happy, not something special. I am going to join Baba Saaiyen’s company from Monday. I have wasted much of my time, now its time to do some stuff.” He changed the direction of the conversation; was firmed with the promise that he had made with Qandeel.

“And what about the politics?” Rohail asked laughing.

“Its going along and now will move speedily. I have prepared myself. In the coming elections I will be participating from Daada Saaiyen’s seat.”

“How this change has come so early, Ilaaf?” Rohail was surprised, because he knew very well, Ilaaf had extremely disliked the politics.

“Just came, will tell you detail some other time.” Perhaps Rohail wanted to talk to him about Qandeel as well, but Ilaaf didn’t give him much time for that and came into his room in order to change the dress.

Then as soon as he came outside after changing, all of them immediately left for the street club in the white fairy of Ilaaf.

Wasting two hours there, they planned to have dinner on the highway.

Leaving Street club the car of Ilaaf had moved little far, when at some distance from the signal, somebody had called his name from the neighboring jeep. Ilaaf turned his head and looked; he was Jawwad who was looking him waving his hand.

Ilaaf smiled unwillingly.

“This mean guy just had to strike today.” Adnan commented laughing.

Jawwad was in convent with them. He was senior of Ilaaf and Rohail and a class fellow of Adnan. Despite of the fact that he was the class fellow of Adnan, his all interests were associated with Ilaaf, because whatever Ilaaf used to do, Jawwad had liked that in any case and most of the time he used to adopt the same activities following Ilaaf. In convent when Ilaaf used to ride his heavy bike then after some time Jawwad also took a sports bike and with insistence, learned driving it from Ilaaf, it was another thing that after learning the bike handling from Ilaaf, he used to invite Ilaaf for the bike race competitions and on the refusal of Ilaaf, used to agree Ilaaf by deferentially blackmailing him. After losing the race from Ilaaf continuously thrice he started to do cheating and that’s why defeated Ilaaf four times after that. As a result, Ilaaf left racing with him, he had hated cheating especially in a thing like play which was a source for fun the cheating was unbearable for Ilaaf. And due to the same reason, Jawwad was beated by Ilaaf twice and the last time when they competed then due to same habit of cheating by Jawwad, Ilaaf being very angry had broken the bike of Jawwad in such a way that it was not usable anymore. But Jawwad was proved to be very firm and stubborn in this case. Ilaaf had never seen a guy more strange, careless and inflexible than him.

As soon as Ilaaf came back Pakistan, Jawwad started to call him and ask for a race between their cars. Perhaps he was among people who passionately loved to these types of competitions. Ilaaf could never be with him for these stupid things and that’s why kept refusing Jawwad, but today he had met Jawwad on the way like this.

Jawwad stopped his small safari jeep in front of Ilaaf’s land cruiser, and that’s why Ilaaf had to stop his car as well.

“What is wrong? Why are you dying?” Ilaaf said taking out his head from the window and laughing.

“If the hurts and wounds are healed of previous turn then Ilaaf can repeat that beating on your desire.” Adnan threw a taunt from the side seat as well.

Jawwad coming out of the jeep, instead of going towards Ilaaf came towards Adnan. And behind him another boy came out of the jeep. Ilaaf recognized him, he was the cousin of Jawwad; Sahil.

“I have to pay the debt of the same hurts and wounds. And therefore trying to agree Ilaaf for months, but he doesn’t get agreed to compete. You ask Ilaaf, to have a race with me, if I lost then will accept my defeat holding my ears.” Adnan turned his head and looked Ilaaf.

“Neither I compete with cheaters nor have any bet with them, because competing should be among parallels, not with those who use wrong means to avoid defeat.”

“I won’t cheat this time, this is my promise.” Jawwad answered like a child.

“You are a liar, neither I trust you nor do I have extra time.” Ilaaf replied in dry tone.

“I have to take revenge of my bike.” Jawwad was straight forward this time.

“Get its penalty from me, and go away.” Ilaaf answered carelessly.

“I don’t need what was its price.”

Then what…..?” Ilaaf looked him.

“I want to do the same with your car, what you did with my bike.”

This time Adnan looked Jawwad angrily.

“Are you in your senses, before you touch Ilaaf’s car, I will make mess of your car.”

“Adnan, be quiet. Let me talk to him.” Ilaaf stopped Adnan then got down from the car and came towards Jawwad. Adnan, Rohail and Shaiq also came out.

“Those who try to cheat Ilaaf Laashari are treated in the same way, how I treated you and your bike.” For a moment the old Ilaaf came out who used to get angry on very little things.

“That was injustice, and injustice is as wrong deed as cheating is.” Ilaaf looked Jawwad. “The cheating was done by me and on that you beated me, that was ok. I don’t have any problem with that hitting, but my bike had no role for that cheating, you had no right to break that in such a way, and you were wrong there.” He was saying the truth; Ilaaf had felt this mistake of his long ago.

“Yes, I admit, I was wrong there, but nothing can be changed now, neither I can bring time back nor can bring your bike in the same position, so then this whole argument is nothing except the wastage of time.”

“This is not the wastage of time, Ilaaf. You have to compensate.”

“What do you want?”

“You will have to have a race on your car with my jeep, and if I won then I will do the same with your car what you did with my bike.” Ilaaf didn’t give any answer just kept thinking.

The situation was now very much serious. Adnan was starring Jawwad and Sahil with a fierce look, Rohail and Shaiq were also observing everything seriously, and Ilaaf…..it was not an ordinary matter for him now.

“Why are you quiet? It is easy to admit mistake, Ilaaf, but to make a compensation for that mistake is always very difficult. I always found you different from many other people with your mouth and character and therefore enjoy playing with you, but today you are thinking too much just for a car.” Saying last sentence Jawwad had critical impression in his tone.

“If you lost then…..” Ilaaf asked.

“Then I will handover my jeep to you; do with it whatever you want to, not a single crease will be appeared on my forehead.” He answered smiling.

“You do cheating, previously just because of these cheap acts of you, I beated you and your bike was broken by me as well.”

“No cheating this time.” Jawwad had naughtiness in his tone as usual. Ilaaf could never understand that strange man.

“And if you did cheating then…..” Ilaaf looked him leaving sentence incomplete.

“Then you will have the full right to bring out your anger on me and my car like you did earlier.”

Ilaaf turning his head looked Adnan and Rohail. Adnan nodded his head while Rohail was silent, perhaps he knew that after the approval of Adnan Ilaaf wouldn’t need the advice by anyone, otherwise perhaps he would have stopped Ilaaf, he was proved to be very careful in these matters.

“Alright, but remember Jawwad. If you tried to cheat or betray me then Ilaaf laashari knows well how to cope up with this.”

Jawwad shaking his head turned back and looked towards the road.

“I am stopping my car here besides your car; we will leave this place together and will go to the foodstreet situated at the end of this road. Turning around from the round about of the foodstreet the person, who will come on the other side of the road and reach here, today’s victory and the evening would be his.

“And if somebody tried to take a short-cut on the way then it will be counted as cheating, the other thing is that we both will have to drive carefully for the sake of other cars on the road, I don’t want that any other person may get trouble due to our bet.” Ilaaf explained.

“Accepted.” This time Jawwad shook his hands with Ilaaf. “I always enjoy playing with you.” They had come towards their respective cars.

Ilaaf was extremely satisfied; he knew that without cheating Jawwad can never beat him in the race. Adnan and Shaiq were also peaceful, if there was someone who didn’t like the entire situation then it was Rohail, Ilaaf understood that by looking his face.

Both cars were parked together, and then on the whistle of Adnan, left together. For a while the small jeep moved ahead from Ilaaf’s car, but then Ilaaf increased the speed and changing the lane skillfully took his land cruiser ahead. Adnan whistled and looked Jawwad, Shaiq also appreciated Ilaaf with an uproar however, Ilaaf couldn’t hear the voice of Rohail, and he was looking entire stuff silently. Sahil also raised a slogan from the jeep of Jawwad. Ilaaf increased the speed. He knew that the foodstreet that is going to be start at the end of this road, its main road would have become narrow due to parking of lots of cars, so that only one single car could be able to move on the road at one time. And it was just possible that one who would take his car on foodstreet road first, would be able to come out from the road first and would win the race.

Jawwad had increased the speed by changing the gear and now his jeep was moving on the road exactly parallel to white fairy of Ilaaf.

Foodstreet was near, and Ilaaf knew very well that when he had to play his last move, he hadn’t increased the speed further and kept driving besides Jawwad. And then the same happened what he had thought, just for a single moment Jawwad went easy and his car left back with distance of few inches from white fairy of Ilaaf, Ilaaf had waited for that moment and he knew very well that how he has to catch that moment. Just few yards before the road of the foodstreet, Ilaaf suddenly changed the gear and straight ahead of Jawwad’s jeep, got his car on the road of the foodstreet. On this success, Adnan had raised a huge roar.

Ilaaf looked into the back mirror; jeep of Jawwad was exactly at the back of his car and even from this distance, Ilaaf could see the changing colors of his face quite easily.

Perhaps Jawwad was looking his defeat now very clearly, and that’s why the sixth sense of Ilaaf alarmed the danger. He was well aware with nature of Jawwad, knew that now Jawwad will somehow try to cheat and win the bet in any case. He was sure that Jawwad will try to find a short-cut, and therefore he asked Adnan.

“Keep an eye on the jeep of Jawwad, now he will try some wrong means.” Adnan with side mirror and Shaiq from back were observing his jeep.

For a while Jawwad tried to overtake, but due to the narrow road it was not easy, and then perhaps as usual his brain was stuffed with disorders.

Ahead there was round-about of foodstreet, turning around from which both cars had to come across the road, and had to reach at the initial spot.

At this hour of the evening, there was huge crowd on foodstreet. Ilaaf making place in between the cars very skillfully turned his car and came at the other side of the road. But his doubt was true; Jawwad couldn’t prevent him from cheating. As soon as Ilaaf brought his car across the road then he looked that jeep of Jawwad was ahead from his car.

A fire just blazed inside out.

“See, what I said to you people, this man can never does anything without cheating. It was predecided to turn the cars from round-about and he has turned his car from the u-turn. What does he think that can I not see and catch this cheating of his.” For a while the same fire was flamed inside him, which always used to blaze on these cheap acts of Jawwad.

“He is a mean, had to show his meanness as usual.” Adnan commented.

“Just have a look, what I do with him. Neither his jeep will be saved nor did he.” Ilaaf said every word chewing.

Ilaaf increased the speed of the car and bringing the car near to the jeep, asked aloud to all three.

“Sit firmly.” The next moment he hit the front part of his car on the back part of jeep. Jawwad’s jeep couldn’t bear the hit of heavy land cruiser and jerked for a moment, Jawwad and Sahil were also bit hurt but Jawwad controlled the car very well. Both cars were harmed. In the side mirror, Jawwad with an indication asked Ilaaf that why did he do like this.

Ilaaf didn’t need to answer; Adnan took out his head from the window.

“Bastard, when had cheated then see the consequences now.” Jawwad said something to Sahil on which Sahil taking out his head from the window had tried to say something, but his faint voice was inaudible both for Adnan and Ilaaf.

“Ilaaf, what has happened to you? If he is cheating then you should behave sensefully, why have you become mad on this crowded road? Don’t you know how dangerous it is?” Rohail had said angrily this time.

“Don’t you worry, I am looking everything and won’t put anyone’s life in danger not even Jawwad’s.” Ilaaf had extreme satisfaction in his tone.

In the dimmed light of street lights Ilaaf looked, there was no car ahead of Jawwad’s car on the road that moment and it was the best chance for him to take the revenge of his cheating.

He had complete trust over his eyesight, and he was sure that there is no other car on that road ahead of Jawwad’s car and he was not going to threat any third person’s life.

He changed the gear and slowed down the speed. The distance of his car from Jawwad’s jeep increased a bit, the very next moment he changed the gear again and kept his foot over accelerator with full power.

White fairy went like the storm and hit the jeep of Jawwad. If somebody had read about the principle of Elastic collision in one dimension in Physics, that day he could ba able to see its practical example with the collision between those two cars. The speed of Ilaaf’s car was transferred to Jawwad’s jeep and this time Jawwad couldn’t control his jeep. His car went ahead with the same speed and this time a loud sound had surprised Ilaaf, like Jawwad’s jeep would have hit something ahead.

Ilaaf slowed down the car immediately.

He felt that his idea that there was no car ahead from Jawwad’s jeep on the road was absolutely wrong.

Jawwad pulled brakes with full power and hardly controlled his jeep then stopped at one side of the road. And just then Ilaaf looked, ahead of Jawwad’s jeep there was the four seater which Ilaaf couldn’t see earlier had got out of control, and sliding over the road went straight to left side and hit the fence outside the restaurant. The rods of the fence had broken the windscreen of the car.

The life moving around Ilaaf was suddenly become motionless, with empty eyes he kept looking that four seater.

“Ilaaf, use the brake.” Adnan yelled, but Ilaaf was out of his senses, his hands were just fixed over steering.

Then he looked, Adnan pulled the handbreak with one hand and moving ahead with proficiency had controlled the steering. White fairy was jerked badly and her tyres were screeched with turning.

The car was stopped exactly at the middle of the road but the moving eyes of Ilaaf and view in those eyes couldn’t stop yet.

Three yards far from the land cruiser there was jeep and after that……that damaged four seater was standing in a zigzag manner.

Ilaaf looked, from the doors of the four seater; a faint line of blood was coming out and flowing over the road. He felt the blood inside his veins was freezing.

Then he looked people around were running towards the four seater, the stoles hanging in the windows were stained with the human blood.

They were three women, and Ilaaf……was their murderer.

The movement of earth, sky and air if can be stopped then for Ilaaf that moment every movement around was stopped. With empty eyes he kept looking everything around him transforming into vapors.

Then he looked, Jawwad taking ou this head from the window and waving his hand, was asking him to reverse the car. Ilaaf had become deaf; he wasn’t able to hear anything.

Adnan shook him. “Ilaaf, what happened to you? Come in your senses.” Ilaaf twitched away his hand badly and opened the front door of the car. He wanted to get down, wanted to take those women to the hospital, wanted to save them, but Adnan suddenly held his hand with strong grip.

“Are you gone mad? All three of them have been died; there is no worth to go down now. Police will be going to reach here soon, and before that we have to leave this area in any case. Staying here and wasting time is worthless.”

Ilaaf just looked Adnan’s face.

Why he had to go away before the arrival of police? He hadn’t committed any crime; he didn’t want to commit any crime, then how was he guilty for this accident, why should he run away like criminals? And if……he was criminal then he should face police, should allow them to arrest him instead that he would run away from the spot of incident. Then why Adnan was asking him to go away, Ilaaf couldn’t understand.

He tried to take out his hand from the hold but it was worthless, perhaps Adnan had read his mind from his empty eyes.

Moving ahead he held Ilaaf with collar and pushing him hard at the back, asked Rohail and Shaiq to hold him.

He was trying to get rid of Adnan’s hold, but then somebody pulled him from the back seat. He was slithering like a fish in the net, but worthless……and then after few moments he was sitting being powerless between Rohail and Shaiq. Both of them had gripped his arms. For a while he kept trying then irritated and moving bit ahead tried to see the four seater.

Adnan reversed the car quickly, and immediately after reversing the car started to give the horns to the cars ahead. All cars that were behind now were getting reversed because the way ahead was nearly closed now. Along with the four seater there were lots of people out there. None of those many people standing on the road had enough courage to curse or ask persons who were responsible for that accident.

After reversing the car, Adnan had to stay for few moments because there was traffic jam ahead for a while.

Ilaaf turned his head helplessly and looked Rohail, and just then his eyes went outside the window unintentionally.

Exactly at some distance to the entrance door of the restaurant which was near to the parking……….

Ilaaf felt like somebody had kicked him down in a deep ditch from maximum height, and he hadn’t enough courage so that, could cry aloud, or could move his body for some help.

Nobody would have felt so much misery for being in the universe, how Ilaaf felt that moment.

In the outside area of the restaurant, standing just near the parking stand, she wasn’t someone else but Qandeel and who was looking Ilaaf with empty eyes.

Those were few moments, after which Adnan had moved the car ahead, and in those few moments Ilaaf had looked Qandeel steadily, had seen the same wonder and disbelief in her eyes which was present in his own eyes that moment.

She was his Qandeel, she was Qandeel Yousuf and she had seen with his eyes…..Ilaaf commiting the greatest crime of this world. She had seen Ilaaf playing with three innocent lives, and taking away the right of living from them.

Ilaaf felt, there was nothing around him, just space and emptiness and he wasn’t enough able so that could feel his presence in that space by moving his hands or feet.

Somebody was shaking his shoulder, he couldn’t feel it. Somebody was calling his name but he couldn’t hear anything.

He wanted to feel but was powerless, couldn’t know that either below his feet there was earth or not, was there sky over the head or not, his body was with him or not, his soul was present in his body or not, his heart was inside his chest or not, heartbeat inside the heart was carried on or not, and he himself……..was existed or not.

1 comment:

  1. What a beautiful intimate romantic dream it was and what a nightmare resulted on the street for Ilaaf, I am depressed but an extremely well written episode this is, the depiction towards the end is awesome.

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